Computer Problem Report Form

 1.  Describe your problem:
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 2.  Now, describe the problem accurately:
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 3.  Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:
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 4.  Problem Severity:
             A.  Minor__
             B.  Minor__
             C.  Minor__
             D. Trivial__
    
 5.  Nature of the problem:
             A.  Locked Up__
             B.  Frozen__
             C.  Hung__
             D.  Strange Smell__
    
 6.  Is your computer plugged in?  Yes__ No__
    
 7.  Is it turned on?  Yes__ No__
    
 8.  Have you tried to fix it yourself?  Yes__ No__
    
 9.  Have you made it worse?  Yes__
    
 10. Have you had "a friend" who  "Knows all about computers"
     try to fix it for you?  Yes__  No__
    
 11. Did they make it even worse?  Yes__
    
 12. Have you read the manual?  Yes__ No__
    
 13. Are you sure you've read the manual?  Maybe__ No__
    
 14. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual?   No__
    
 15. If you read the manual, do you think you understood it?  Yes__ No__
    
 16. If 'Yes' then explain why you can't fix the problem yourself.
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 17. What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem occurred?
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 18. If you answered 'nothing' then explain why you were logged in?
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 19. Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem?  Yes__ No__
     
 20. Does the clock on your home VCR blink 12:00?  Yes__ What's a VCR?__
   
 21. Do you have a copy of 'PCs for Dummies'?  Yes__ No__
   
 22. Do you have any independent witnesses to the problem?  Yes__ No__
    
 23. Do you have any electronics products that DO work?  Yes__ No__
    
 24. Is there anyone else you could blame this problem on? Yes__ No__
   
 25. Have you given the machine a good whack on the top?  Yes__ No__
    
 26. Is the machine on fire?  Yes__ Not Yet__
    
 27. Can you do something else instead of bothering me?  Yes__